You Might Need a Makeover

In continuation of our discussion of how to combat ageism, we will also continue our homage to Jeff Foxworthy.

• If you recognize your favorite work outfit on a rerun of The Nanny, you might need a makeover.
• If your glasses make you look like Aristotle Onassis, you might need a makeover.

But seriously folks, whether you like it or not, today's young people (read that, hiring managers) are very image conscious. It is pervasive throughout our society, and doesn't indicate a weakness on the part of a specific hiring manager. It's just how society works today. The best way to combat this is to work within it -- you'll get a job more quickly if you play within today's rules, rather than fighting against them.

Therefore, to combat ageism in person, you must be image conscious.

Women

• If you haven't changed your hairstyle in 5 years, you need a makeover.
• Hairstyle, part deux, if the third of your hair farthest from your head sports a different color or different texture than the third closest to your head, you need a makeover.
• Hairstyle, part trois, if you have a standing weekly appointment with your hairdresser for a wash and set, you need a makeover.
• If you haven't updated your eyewear in 5 years, you need a makeover.
• If you have not recently experienced a total and spiritual transformation in your makeup application, you need a makeover. (No need to mention the dark lip liner faux pas.)
• If relatives mention how much you're looking like your mother, you need a makeover.
• If you wore a slip during your last 30 days of employment, you need a makeover.
• If you pride yourself on how comfortable and sensible your shoes are, you need a makeover.

Tip: Your clothing should be modern, fashionable and age-appropriate.
Extra Tip: No thick red claws at the interview.

Men

• If you have a comb-over, you need a makeover.
• Seriously, if you have a comb-over, you need a makeover.
• If your belt has started riding north of your belly button, you need a makeover. (If your belt acts as an underwire for your moobs, you need a makeover.)
• If your idea of an interview outfit involves a suit vest or a wifebeater-T, you need a makeover.
• If you wear cologne to work, you need a makeover.
• If you wear a bracelet or a pinkie ring to an interview, you need a makeover.
• If you wear suede shoes to an interview, you need a makeover

Tip: A buzz cut looks much more youthful than a comb-over.
Extra Tip: Shoes and belt should match, pants and socks should match.

Good luck with your Re-Image!